Stuff Stephen Hates #1: will.i.am

In the spirit of the political season, the first thing that boils my blood today is will.i.am and the disgusting pretension of his campaign for Barak Obama. First, just to clarify, I like Barry Obama. (see Stuff White People like #8: Barak Obama), but I DO NOT like that people to want to force him down my throat like trying to get a dog to swallow a pill by coating it in peanut butter, rubbing it on the back of his tongue, and then holding his head back until his gives up. What is more, I really liked the idea of will.i.am's video when I first heard about it. Sounds pretty interesting, right? Take a bunch of inspirational quotes from Barry himself, set them to music, yes we can yes we can. Sounds pretty groovy. But something was rotten in the state of youtube. I mean, will.i.am is the same guy who cleverly disguised his song "Let's get Retarded" by changing the title to the significantly less sickeningly offensive "Let's get it started." And will.i.am is the same guy who gave Fergie a career. And he's even in Fergalicious and My Humps with the "brilliant" lyrics of 'Whatcha gonna do with all that junk inside that trunk?' and HE FUCKING CALLS HIMSELF WILL.I.AM! From now on I will only go as Step.he.n. Yes. Step.he.n. BRILLIANT!

Anyway, Then you watch the video. Ugh...I had to watch it again just for this post.. and it pisses me off. The black and white. Fucking Scarlet Johanson. The chanting. YES WE CAN. YES WE CAN. SHUT THE FUCK UP. Its like a goddamn Apple commercial (and I'm a Mac user... but damn I hate the smell of pretension). And what's the worst part of it? People sending it to you saying "watch this. It'll change you life" like they are Natalie Portman and Obama is the fucking Shins or something. Blech.

Then, as if to add insult to injury, he released a follow up video.

And I think its even worse. I don't give two shits about what Jessica Alba thinks. You know what? She's not that hot. And I don't care if she's all preggers. And I hate these goddamn videos!

Still, I guess at least it inspired this.
now that, is comic genius.

I like Barry. I'll happily vote for him in november. And not just because I hate John McCain. But FUCK! If I have to hear will.i.am tell me to vote for him any more, I may loose it. But anyway, successful first post!